No one likes the word, no. Well, at least I’m not a fan of it. Growing up, I despised the word. Most kids probably hate hearing it, but I felt a certain kind of way.  The word ‘no’ just felt so direct, blunt, and permeant.  It felt like outright rejection.  “What do you mean, no?” is what I would say in my mind because I wasn’t crazy enough to say it out loud. Truth be told, I still give a little side-eye when I hear it now, but I have learned how to deal with it better.

After hearing the word “No” more than I would have liked as a child, as an adult I was determined to always tell myself yes.  The result was a mountain full of debt.

Robbing Peter to pay Paul was my side hustle, because I always got what I wanted.  But that came with a cost, that I wasn’t able to pay at the time.  The house of cards was on the brinks of tumbling down.  I had to make a change. (Read about Money Mistakes)

Once I decided that I needed to do something different if I wanted to get out of the rat race and create wealth, I made a few changes.  Changing my mindset and defining what I wanted were the first things I did, but there was one critical shift that allowed me to stay the course.

Changing my “No” to “Not yet.”

It may not seem earth-shattering, but it worked wonders for my psyche.  Anytime I got the urge to splurge or purchase outside of my budget, instead of saying ‘No’, I would tell myself ‘Not Yet’.

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Shifting from “No to Not Yet”

Words are powerful and that slight change from ‘no’ to ‘not yet’ made a huge difference for me.  ‘Not Yet’ wasn’t a flat-out denial, but a recognition of my desire and an acknowledgment of receiving it in the future.  Similar to when people are on a diet and they see their favorite dessert that they shouldn’t have.  Instead of forgetting about it, they continue to focus on what they should not have and eventually they devour it and the diet is out the window.  Budgeting can be the same way.  You can deprive yourself to an extreme that you overspend.  Then you may be in a worse position than you started.

Saying ‘not yet’ alleviated the anxiety and the excessive attention of not having it now because in the future I knew it would be mine.

Don’t Be Ashamed of Your Wants

I understand the need vs. wants technique when managing your budget.  Acknowledging the difference between a need vs a want is a useful exercise. However, in the personal finance industry, I think it is overused to shame people into devaluing a want.

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Yes, there are priorities to how you spend your money.

Yes, your money should pay for your needs and financial goals first.

However, wanting other things that are outside of your needs is ok.  The key is to ensure your wants are in the right priority.

Now that you can acknowledge your wants shamelessly and know the technique to manage your resources, here are 3 practical and simple steps to keep your budget on track.

Three Simple Ways to Shift from ‘No’ to ‘Not Yet’

1. Get clear on your priorities

Get clear on what you want to accomplish with your money.  Do you want to purchase a home next year?  Do you want to contribute more to your retirement? Do you want to build another income stream to get closer to financial freedom?   (Learn to calculate your financial freedom number).

Whatever you want to accomplish next, focus on that.  That means if you want to purchase a house or a rental property next year, then you must save for the down payment and pause on financing a new car.  In this scenario, the car is the want that you must delay to achieve purchasing a home.  No one is saying that you cannot have a new car, but it may not happen just yet.

2. Align your progress with incentives

Why do people use the carrot on the stick approach so much? Because it works.  Incentives can motivate you to stay the course.  Knowing that there is a reward after you accomplish reach a milestone could be the extra push you need to get to the ultimate goal.

So, once you hit your target, TREAT YO’SELF.

Be careful that your reward is not greater than your progress.  For example, don’t pay off $250 credit card debt and then purchase $900 pair of shoes when you still have other consumer debt to pay for.  Balance it out.

3. Establish a plan to get what you want

Saying ‘not yet’ also allows you time to plan for the purchase in the future.  This will help you avoid impulse purchases and assess your priorities.   Once you assess your priorities, then you can develop a logical path forward. Through this exercise, you can decide a date for when you will achieve your main goal and allocate enough money to pay for your reward. It’s a double win – you achieve your goal and get the reward without using debt.

My Real Life Example

My dream car is an all-white Maserati, fully loaded with beige interior.  (Yep, financial educators can have expensive taste too.) I have wanted this car for years. Could I have found a way to finance it by now? Yep, but it did not align with my current priorities.  Instead of saying no, I’m saying not yet.  I will receive my car when I’ve earned enough passive income to pay for my current lifestyle.

How am I going to do this? I plan to continue to expand my rental property portfolio to generate enough cash flow to cover my needs and wants.

As much as I want the car, I don’t want it at the expense of achieving financial independence first. I don’t want to exchange my time for my dream car.  So, I’ll get it, just not yet.  My motivation is to create enough wealth so purchasing this car becomes a non-factor.

I encourage you to do the same.

Final Thoughts

Language is extremely important and sometimes the slightest word changes can make a world of difference. Try it out.  Change your no to not yet and develop a plan to get it.

You also don’t have to be ashamed of what you want to purchase.  Many people will tell you what you need or don’t need and they may be right. You don’t need it, you may just want it. That’s ok.  If you want luxury, you can get luxury.  The key is to make sure your money is ready for luxury first!

Ask yourself, “What are you going to say ‘Not Yet’ to so that you can achieve your next goal?”

That’s getting your Finances On Point.